In the future we'll all be gay
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
