just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Randomize
