Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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