Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
