Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
