Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
she told me i tasted like america
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Randomize
