u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
