remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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