How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
