I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
