If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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