I understand why you refuse to be sober now
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
