found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I want to fling myself into the sun
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
