ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
