It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
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