i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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