Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
you will always have a special place in my vag
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
