I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
