I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
