just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Send help, water and tortillas.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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