Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize