So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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