She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
