I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
