I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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