If that was your dad, he is hot
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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