I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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