just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
