My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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