It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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