do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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