Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
