Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I deserve this hangover.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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