He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
