"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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