i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Come see our sink grown plant.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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