We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
