that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Just puked most of my soul out..
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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