porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
