big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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