try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
