More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Randomize
