How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
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