there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
