That's when you crack a 10am beer
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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