So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
