Screwed.edu
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I said "one day" and that day is not today
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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