We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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