im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
My bed is full of blood and feathers
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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