he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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