Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
